Don’t steal the Charmin

I woke myself up this morning by slapping myself in the face.

I was dreaming that I had walked into a single strand of a spider web and the biggest hobo spider was crawling on my head. He wasn’t able to bite me through my hair, and I knew it was only a matter of seconds before he made his way to my face and took a big, juicy bite. So I did what anyone would do in this situation; I panicked and threw my hands on my head to brush the beast off of my head.

It’s difficult to go back to sleep after having been slapped in the face.

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People steal the strangest things from restaurants. Our red pepper or parmesan containers disappear. We went from 14 menus at the counter to 4 in two months. The table tents with our specials walk off in a backpack or purse. And of course, toilet paper.

I used to stock our bathrooms with only the best: double-quilted Charmin. Now, that’s not something you brag about to your customers, but I’m sure they noticed. How could you not? That’s a fine specimen of toilet paper. Only, the toilet paper began disappearing, and not because it was being used.

So I’ve down-graded our bathroom tissue to the cheap stuff like every other public lavatory. Blame it on the toilet paper thieves.

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We’ve been busy the past few nights, and have few to no mistakes. The crew is really gelling right now, and our timing is spot on. Sometimes a job well done is what gets me through the day. I’m struggling to find the time to get all of the business side of our business done each day, though. It seems as if my to-do list never ends.

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